Every now and then I take a moment to inventory ![\"\"](\"https:\/\/www.carouselandrockinghorses.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/02\/single-mom-233x300.jpg\" "\\"single-mom\\"")
the athletic trophies of my youth, literary awards for the novels I penned and yes I also deliberate over the scars I\u2019ve earned along the way.\u00a0 Oddly enough, many of the techniques we use to deal with what life throws at us can be traced back our childhoods.\u00a0 Although I\u2019m over forty now, I often find myself dealing with situations based on lessons learned in a household run and operated by an extraordinary single mom, my mother.<\/p>\n
One of her favorite quotes nudges me along from time to time and manages to keep me pushing forward.\u00a0 She\u2019d say, \u201cFor every dream, there are a hundred people ready to chase it.\u00a0 But somewhere between sweat equity and elbow grease, most of them get tired and quit running.\u201d<\/p>\n
Of course that sounds like a no brainer but allow me to explain.\u00a0 A single mom\u2019s take home pay is a treasure in limited quantity.\u00a0 Divide it up among the bills, food, clothing, etc. and what\u2019s left rarely covers much else.\u00a0 In order to increase the odds for an occasional movie ticket or pocket change for convenient store snacks, there were shower time limits to help with the water bill and extreme measures to cut electricity usage in half.\u00a0 Once I went a solid two weeks without touching a light switch.\u00a0 My reward was popcorn and candy during a Kung Fu movie marathon.<\/p>\n
Really, before the lights come on.\u00a0 I was well into my teens before getting up the nerve to question that one.\u00a0 My mother\u2019s reply was simple.\u00a0 \u201cThere\u2019s always a split second when the fun stops and the trouble starts.\u00a0 Somehow it seems to show up around the same time the street lights come on.\u201d <\/strong>\u00a0There\u2019s still something to be said for knowing when it\u2019s time to go home.<\/p>\n There was an era before the remote control existed.\u00a0 How did we change the channel?\u00a0 We got up off our behinds, walked over the TV Set and manually turned the dial (every time)!\u00a0 I was my mom\u2019s favorite remote control for years.\u00a0 When the dial became worn out or broken, vice grips were used to channel-hop to the other 3 stations.\u00a0 Yes, I said other 3.\u00a0 When various other household appliances or bedposts, kitchen table legs and alarm clocks became ragged; duct tape was brought in to patch it up, hold it together or tie it down until it absolutely had to be thrown out.\u00a0 Years later I used two rolls of duct tape to hold my first car together, until I could afford another one.\u00a0 Thanks mom.<\/p>\n Three reasons: 1) Leftovers are already paid for.\u00a0 2) At arm\u2019s reach in the refrigerator. 3) And recently delicious.\u00a0 Since good eats were good eats, I never complained and didn\u2019t spend a single dime on take out until I was a sophomore in college.\u00a0 Now my kids love left overs\u2026 and they hate chipping in for takeout.\u00a0\u00a0 Everything costs something.<\/p>\n Going on and on about the bicycle I bought with paper route money wasn\u2019t the smartest thing I ever did.\u00a0 My friends avoided me every time I ran my mouth and showed off motor-cross stunts at the sand lot.\u00a0 It took me a while to realize the lack of job opportunities that existed for teenagers in my neighborhood.\u00a0 I should have been more considerate and less conceited.<\/p>\n When I was around nine years old, I outgrew my fascination for eating boxed cereal throughout the day.\u00a0 My mother was understandably concerned when she learned I\u2019d planned on frying chicken for lunch.\u00a0 Instead of blowing a gasket, she sat me down and explained how I wasn\u2019t quite old enough for that.\u00a0 Sensing my frustration, she taught me how to pan sear sliced bologna on a skillet.\u00a0 I can still smell that meat steaming, rising in the middle and browning around the outer rim.\u00a0 I felt like an accomplished cook that day and never enjoyed a sandwiched more.\u00a0 Everything in its own time I guess.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n One day I heard the enchanting music of an ice cream truck in the distance.\u00a0 As the festival tune grew louder, I pleaded with my mother for loose change.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t believe it when she admitted being flat broke, with a weekend standing between her and the next pay check.\u00a0 She gave me the go ahead to ramble through her purse and said I could keep whatever money I found.\u00a0 I was more disturbed over the thought of being poor than my search coming up empty until mom soothed my concerns with tender words and a few basic principles of economics.\u00a0 \u201cPoor people are all out of options son.\u00a0 We\u2019re just all out of money and that\u2019s called broke.\u00a0 There\u2019s a world of difference.\u201d<\/p>\n For years my mother caught the city bus to work while saving for a new car.\u00a0 She couldn\u2019t risk losing money on a used lemon or the safety of her two small children so sacrificed until having enough for a sizable down payment and an affordable monthly note.\u00a0 We toured around town in that 1976 powder blue colored Ford Elite all weekend.\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t understand it when she went back to catching the bus that Monday morning.\u00a0 When I asked why, she shrugged as if the answer was right in front of me.\u00a0 \u201cYou don\u2019t want to go upsetting things at the job.\u00a0 Driving up in a better car than your boss will do it every time.\u201d<\/p>\n Her wisdom didn\u2019t ring true to me until years later when I held a vice president position at a local bank.\u00a0 My new manager refused to award me the bonus check I\u2019d earned from the previous quarter.\u00a0 He said, \u201cYou drive a Mercedes so I know you don\u2019t need the money.\u201d\u00a0 After a discussion with the CEO, I got what was coming to me then decided it was time to do something else for a living.\u00a0 Subsequently, I took up writing and managed to create 13 bestselling books.\u00a0 I\u2019d say everything worked out just fine.<\/p>\n Single moms seldom get the credit they deserve for managing more than their share of hardships and headaches.\u00a0 They often go unheralded, unsung and unappreciated.\u00a0 Too many times, they put their aspirations on a shelf while working tirelessly to make their children\u2019s dreams come true.\u00a0 Single Moms of America, I salute you.<\/p>\n Victor writes money management tips and other helpful hints for ace cash express.\u00a0 Before joining ace, Victor wrote 13 bestselling novels and worked in upper management in the banking industry.\u00a0 When Victor is not helping consumers with responsible spending ideas, he\u2019s working on a \u201cTalking Money Tips\u201d audio book.\u00a0 Follow him on twitter @iwritemoneytips\u00a0 @acecash<\/em><\/p>\nLesson 3 \u2013 Vise grips and duct tape can fix it<\/h2>\n
Lesson 4 \u2013 Leftovers are better than take out<\/h2>\n
Lesson 5 \u2013 Don\u2019t rub other people\u2019s noses in your success<\/h2>\n
Lesson 6 \u2013 Pan seared bologna, almost too good to be true <\/strong><\/h2>\n
Lesson 7- Broke doesn\u2019t mean poor<\/strong><\/h2>\n
Lesson 8 \u2013 Never appear to be more prosperous than the boss<\/h2>\n